The Queen of Procrastination Strikes Again..

[yes, I am royalty]

So, we're leaving on a trip early Saturday morning..

Like an 11 day trip..

Am I ready? No..

You are probably thinking, "you have 3 whole days, you're fine"

No, I really don't..

First, I take FOR.E.VER to pack..

Today I have dance festival at the elementary school, Chelsea has graduation practice, I have to pick up the dog from the groomer in American Fork (don't ask, but he had to be there at 7am), I have to pick up my new coffee table, need to get the rest of Chelsea's graduation gift [the exact one we want won't get here before we leave town, so settling for 2nd choice.. ugh] I need to find someone to feed my dog, cats and Chelsea's fish while we're gone, and I need a substitute for 2 Sundays in Nursery (did I mention I'm out of Cub Scouts and in the nursery now? Yay! I love Nursery!)

Tomorrow.. Well, GRADUATION.. Plus I have my parents coming in town (luckily, I don't think they expect me to be entertaining..) I guess I'll do my last minute laundry?

Friday.. Last day of school for little girls, packing, convincing Chelsea she wants to go [this is ongoing.. :)]

And now, before I curl in a ball, I need to wake up the girlies!!

Senior Pictures!

Our lives seem to be a flurry of excitement around Chelsea right now..

As many of you know, we all (except Adeline) suffer from a serious case of procrastination, so we hadn't got Chelsea's senior pictures done (and my circumstances didn't help this, obviously)..

So, last Saturday she and I ran around to do some photos of our own to get out in her graduation announcements. Luckily, after some trial and error, we found a great location - not in direct sunlight (a key!) - and got a few shots we were excited about!!

We ran and got them developed that same day - and they must have been okay, because they asked me for the copyright on them, and I had to explain & prove that I had taken them myself, and I even had to fill out paperwork to say I had taken them! We got some sent out Monday, and a second set sent out today (again, procrastinating looking for addresses) .. (and okay, I still have just a couple of addresses to locate..)

So.. here are a few of our favorites -

we sent out this one^

and this one^ (but it was also in sepia)

I'm Coming Back!!

I had my d&c on Thursday, and I'm feeling pretty amazing..

You have a whole new outlook on life when you don't feel like vomitting 24/7!!

I was able to clean a lot of my main floor today!! Yay!! I can't complain, the family did a good job of keeping up for me, but I'm sorry, I just do it different!! I feel like I'm starting to take my home back!!

I still have SO much to catch up on (don't think about the laundry..) but I at least feel like I can!!

Thanks everyone for what you've said and done for me!! It really means so so much!!

bear with me on this one..

A few weeks ago, I was remembering a conversation I had with my mom in December of 1997..

At this point in our lives, Chelsea was almost 7 years old, and after years of hoping/wishing/trying/crying for a baby, I was finally coming to terms that it wasn't going to happen for us..

In fact, I was listing the advantages of having only one child [2 I will highlight]

At least I had ONE!! so many would never have that, and I didn't want to EVER seem ungrateful for that.. 

And.. we were past the point of having to baby switch at Disneyland/World..

 

On our last family trip (in October) to Disneyland, I 

commented to Davy that it had taken us 11 years to 

get back to that point..

Because the following September (of '98) we had 

Savannah, followed 3 years later by Adeline..

As I was planning our little girls' surprise trip to 

Disneyland this March, I couldn't help but think 

of the irony of these thoughts.. Because I had 

recently found out I was pregnant again..

SHOCK.. 

I know..

Those of you who know us well, know we've never had an easy time getting pregnant, and learned long ago that 

our family planning wasn't up to us, it was up to 

Heavenly Father..

You also may know that I've had 3 previous miscarriages.One right before getting pregnant with Adi, at 10 weeks; one when Adi was about 1 1/2 also at 10 weeks; and one 

in September of 2007 at 19 weeks..

Because of our recent poor track record, the only people who have known until now are me, Davy and Chelsea..

This is not easy:

I get very sick (especially now) very nauseous, lots of 

vomit, and my new added bit of fun; ice-pick stabbing 

into my brain headaches..

I'm very much a get out and do something kind of person, and I've spent the last 7 weeks in bed.. literally.. I have 

fallen off the face of the earth.. 

We chose not to tell the little girls yet, losing that last 

one was very hard on them.. (but they have confided in 

Davy that they're worried I have swine flu)

I am not getting any younger.. I know if I were a 

celebrity, I'm that prime age to have a baby.. but I live in Springville, Utah and have an 18 year old daughter, it 

makes me feel old to be doing this..

So yesterday, May 5th, I had my 12 week appointment.. My OB and his nurse (both of whom I 

adore) were quick to tell me that he had delivered a 

woman last Friday who was 48.. Which 

made me feel like a spring chicken,.. really..

Since I am technically 11 weeks and 3 days, he said we 

should be able to hear a heartbeat, but its early, and 

when we couldn't we weren't worried.. But given my 

track record, he decided to send me to Jay, the fabulous 

ultrasound guy, just to make sure..

So I rushed off to Spanish Fork, drinking a Gatorade as 

fast as I could, so I'd have something in my bladder..

I have had many ultrasounds in my life, this being my 

(gulp!) 7th pregnancy..

I knew the second we could see the baby.. 

There was no little flutter in its body that shows a 

heartbeat..

That strange part of me had 2 distinct reactions:

1. I can't believe I've lost another baby.. Even when I'm still feeling so horribly sick
2. This poor man.. He has to tell me that my baby isn't alive.. For what a fun, exciting job this can be, this part has to be terrible..

He, of course, was amazingly sweet, and really took the time to "show me around" and to scratch his head..

Another amazing part, is he showed me parts of the baby that indicate that it had literally died within the last few hours.. Even so far as to say that when I woke up that morning it was probably still alive.. That is hard to believe.. I can honestly say that I'm glad it happened this way.. I know what's coming..

So, here I am today, waiting to miscarry..

Still feeling annoyingly nauseated..

Still with a brain-splitting headache..

And now, nothing to show for it..

Ironically, I'm really pretty okay.. I've gotten good at not getting my hopes up too high..

Oh, and did I say that Davy is in Alabama? He's feeling pretty terrible that he's not here..

I can say, I'm so so glad we decided to keep this a secret, especially from the little girls.. So don't say anything to them if you see them.. Thanks!

Thanks for listening/reading..

*this should explain my lack of blogging*

Prom-a Drama

So.. we all know my little ::sigh:: ChelseaKate is a Senior.. graduating in just over a month.. ::bigger sigh::

So.. there are certain things, as a mom, I want to have happen.. One of them.. going to Prom.. 

This is a risky business.. I know she wants to go too, but is trying not to make a big deal "it's fine if I don't go".. but its not fine with me!! 

Really, Really, Really want her to go!!!

Her Prom past is varied..

Sophomore year - had a boyfriend who went on a cruise during Prom.. didn't go.. (was sad, especially when she happened to look out the window as our neighbor was being picked up.. first - and one of only times - ever really teenagery emotional)

Junior year - had a boyfriend, who, with the help of his fabulous mother (who I love) asked her in an amazing way, looked amazing together, and had an amazing time.. (this was quite a feat of planning, you have no idea.. we were out of town 2 weeks before (for the week), he was out of town the next week, plus he was playing baseball every day, and while we were out of town his mother realized that he had one day to get a tux, so he went and picked colors, and when we got home we went and found a dress.. (he's totally the type of kid you could trust to do this) and like I said.. they looked fabulous, and had a great time..

[on a total side note, did you know these 2 ex-boyfriends are in our ward?? makes for fun!! actually she is on great terms with both, and I'm friends with both moms..]

Senior year - as of Sunday had not been asked, and Prom is this Saturday, the 26th.. UGH!!

So last night, she gets a text from a guy [we'll call boy #1] who has liked her since her Sophomore year.. and they get talking about Prom.. He finds out she hasn't been asked, and is bummed because he would have asked her, but then says.. "My friend will ask you, so if anyone asks you say no.. "

Well, we're not exactly holding my breath on this.. He goes on to say, "Do you have a dress?" which the answer is no.. didn't just go buy a Prom dress because we were bored.. "Well get one, he's going to ask you".. again - no breath holding.. [plus, its Sunday night in Utah County, kid, you expect her to hop up at 8:30 p.m. and find a dress??].. This goes on and on back and forth for a few hours.. 

FINALLY the actual boy [boy #2] texts her and says, Yes, I'm asking you.. 

SO.. beginning about 7 this morning, boy #1 is hounding her about her dress.. "What color?"" When will you get it?" "We're getting our tuxes during 3rd and 4th period.." When does he think we're going shopping? Now, Chelsea doesn't have class 3rd & 4th because of her intern, so this is when we plan to go.. [being hounded the whole time] Luckily, boy #2, the actual date, is intermittently texting and saying.. You're fine, take your time.. Well, we TOTALLY luck out, going to a shop we've never been to before, find a dress we love that will be ready by Thursday (it was too big).. and, for a Prom dress, not too expensive!!!  Got boutonniere ordered, all that good stuff..

So we're ready!!

Now.. the date.. 

She is pretty sure she talked to him a couple times in 7th grade!! 5 years ago!! 

She was talking to a boy at school today who asked who she was going to Prom with, and he looked surprised, then said, "oh! I didn't know you knew each other.." When she said they really didn't.. his response?? "Well.. Be Safe!!" 

"YIKES!!" 

That is what mom is thinking right now.. oh, and did I mention they're going 4-wheeling for their day date??.. eeek!

She promises he isn't too bad.. Here's hoping!!!

Cross your fingers for us!!!

[P.S. a big thanks to my darling ChelseaKate, I don't even feel like I need to backtrack or explain my unpardonable lack of posting]

..and happy anniversary to my mom & dad!! 41 years!!..